For some women, getting pregnant can feel like war, and when it’s through the In-Vitro Fertilization (IVF) method, there are additional battles to fight.
Pregnancy brings with itself joy, hope and also pain. The pain is either physical or/and emotional. Just like each body is different, every pregnancy also differs from woman to woman. And if you’re not able to conceive the natural way, add to this mix, the draining and overwhelming journey of deciding what to do next.
With so many options now available to couples, IVF or (In-vitro Fertilization) has become common in the last decade or so. It is an expensive and painful procedure and the decision is never easy. We sat down with Navneet (a stay-at-home mother of twins) who shared her struggles and victories related to IVF with us.
How easy/difficult was it for you to decide on the IVF method to bring a new life to this world? Did you feel there is a stigma attached to it, especially in our country?
It wasn’t an easy decision at all because first, there was a lot of money involved. We tried all other ways initially, including advice from astrologers. As there was no guarantee that we will conceive at the end of the IVF process, we kept looking for options. The stigma was obviously there. Even today, my in-laws don’t know that I conceived through IVF.
Another aspect of the process is that it requires a lot of time. You have to visit your doctor frequently and regularly, which can be tiresome. Working women have additional challenges to face, like taking time off for it from work. One has to consider a lot of things.
What was the role of your partner in this pregnancy? Did he support you through it all?
It wasn’t easy for me to convince my husband at first. In our case, his sperm count was also low but he wasn’t sure about spending so much money on something that didn’t have a 100% success rate. As far as social stigma is concerned, he actually wanted to adopt rather than make me go through the painful process.
Do you feel your challenges were different than a natural pregnancy? If yes, in what way?
Honestly, I have only experienced IVF so I cannot compare. But I have friends who have conceived naturally and I feel there wasn’t much of a difference.
Each woman experiences pregnancy differently, be it IVF or natural. The only thing different in my case was the way I conceived. Navneet
What is your advice for women who are just starting off with their IVF procedure? And to those who are still not sure about it?
My advice is that if you are already thinking about it, do not waste any more time and energy in exploring other options and go for it. The chances are the same – either 0 or 100% – for any individual. I have friends who conceived through IVF after I shared my journey with them and are now happy mothers.
Has this journey made you stronger? If yes, in what ways?
Well, it is really not the IVF journey that has made me stronger, but the journey of being a mother to my precious two. As someone who wants to conceive but can’t naturally, there is this one pain/emotion that one has to deal with. But once you become a mother, there are a thousand sentiments that you deal with, every single day. I am so grateful that after years of trying hard for a normal pregnancy, and then miscarriages, other fertility treatments, and medicines, the journey has been worth it at the end. I am definitely stronger and happier today.
Navneet didn’t want to be identified, which is why we haven’t mentioned her full name.
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